Let me tell you a little something about 2011: they have robots here. Robots that will knit for you. I’ve captured some proof for those of you skeptical of my findings:
Maybe you’re a little distrusting of robots. There’s that whole idea that these same robots performing menial tasks for you will someday turn against humans in an effort to save and protect them. [see: I, Robot] For now, I think they’re pretty cool. And I’ll probably be an old hag sitting on a rocking chair cursing some knitting project by the time they decide to hook me up to a machine and drain the remaining bits of energy from my body to be used in batteries [see: The Matrix].
So now that we got that out of the way, let me share another fact about 2011. There aren’t any devil shawls here to knit! Booyah, bitches!!
I’m totally doing my victory dance, shaking my ass in the monitor. Woops, I pongoo’d. Let me distract you with images from the blocking process. It will help you forget that I farted in your face.
It’s been complete for about a week now, so I’m excited to say that I rang in the new year without dragging in an unfinished shawl, but instead blocking it out into submission.
Oh, and if you were curious about how working with a superglued knitting needle panned out…it didn’t. In the end, I filed down the needle to a semi-workable point. For the last quarter of the edging, I was working with this:
All the pain and agony of knitting this shawl was mostly worth it. I was really hoping to get it done in time for Christmas so I could give it to my mom in person, but I’ll just have to settle for mailing it down just in time for her birthday. I know she’ll be happy and love it, because there was this one time I had to gift-wrap a wooden box, no a solid block, for mother’s day way back in grade school. That was a shitty gift; definitely not my idea. I can’t even remember what that was supposed to represent. What, that my love for her is as solid as a block of wood that can be chiseled away and burned to ashes in a matter of seconds? They should have given us solid blocks of Titanium. I think she threw it away after a week of staring at the dust collecting on it’s poorly wrapped surface. This shawl is close to four hundred million times better than that stupid wooden block.
Pattern: Frost Flowers and Leaves by Eugen Beugler for A Gathering of Lace
Yarn: Jaggerspun Zephyr in Lilac, approx 2500 yards
Needles: 2.5mm (US 1) Knit Picks Harmony wood circular
Modifications: Used lace weight yarn and US 1 needles Casualties: Two broken needles and a partially shattered soul
Recommend to a friend: Maybe a frenemy?